on being a slut

I called her "my slut" often. She revelled in it. She delighted in having rediscovered her sensuality and a powerful sexual desire. It had not always been like this. At the start she made it clear she did not want to be called a "slut" or a "whore". She was neither of these things. She could not understand how being addressed in this way would support her journey into submission.

But her submission made her wet. It filled her with desire. She cried out for release. She wanted release over and over. She started to call herself a slut. My slut. She became proud to be my slut.

She and I knew that this word is used as a term of abuse often by men but also often by other women towards a woman because of her active sexuality. If a man has several partners then other men are jealous. It is seen as a sign of virility. It can be regarded as a positive characteristic. Women are often drawn to such men rather than being repelled by their behaviour. Their sexual virility is in itself alluring. However if a woman has several partners, flaunts her sexuality or dresses in a sexually provocative manner this is often seen negatively by society and condemned. The word "slut" is then often used as a term of abuse against such women. In "real life", outside of the special D/s world we shared, I would never call anyone a slut. It is a horrible word in that context and not one that it would occur to me ever to use. However it is all a matter of context and understanding.

So when I called her my slut that was in the context of our relationship. Out in the day to day world of her profession and her friends she was a slightly cool and reserved woman. Nobody would have called her a slut.

In real life she would never have been called a slut but I noticed her beginning to loosen a little and enjoying expressing a little more slight intimacy and contact and becoming pleased by the results. But in our relationship we were inhabiting a special private place where we could be things that society might not like and that we might not dream of being out in that real world.

In our special place I wanted her to be a wanton woman who could be as sexually open and active as she desired with no expectations of society to hold her back. I wanted her to want sex with her Master, to crave it, to crave his sexual pleasure too. I wanted her to be totally uninhibited about it. So if I called her a slut we had turned the value judgement part of the meaning of the word around. It was no longer a term of abuse because in the relationship we had created to be wanton and sexually active was a positive trait not a negative one. So being a slut became an expression of praise rather than admonishment. I wanted her to be my slut. That was part of her purpose in the world we had created. If it gave her an additional frisson because it was something "forbidden" that she was doing, that she had found a safe place to be "bad", then all to the good. Sometimes using the word "slut" can heighten that sense.

So she was my slut. I had perhaps helped to create that slut. We both had fun with her being my slut.

But just recently another friend called herself a slut - though I thought with some reservation - as if she was worried she should feel some shame about a recent sexual adventure. I hope she can reclaim the word "slut" as a positive characteristic - as a woman who is confident about her sexuality and is prepared to have fun in the ways that she wants as long as she hurts nobody else.