non-consensual sex

A new survey in the UK has reported that one in ten women say that they have been forced into having sex against their will. Few will have reported this as rape and many may not even have considered it rape. The figure is double the number of women who say they have been raped. The legal difference in the UK is that the woman not only does not consent but also requires the pepetrator to not reasonably believe that the victim consents. The effect on the victim though is likely to be much the same.

D/s and BDSM is built on consent yet is often misunderstood and criticised in the vanilla world. Yet out in the vanilla world it seems more and more the case that consent of the woman is assumed rather than sought. Perhaps the very nature of the D/s world where there is an emphasis on consent makes it a safer place to play than in the vanilla world.

However we should not be too self satisfied. I am sure there is manipulaton and abuse in the D/s world also and cases where things go horribly wrong. It is worrying too that if the notion that consent is not sought becomes a reality then there are even greater dangers if this were to spread into the world of BDSM.