Thursday, 6 March 2014

BDSM and sexual satisfaction

Sh has never been fully sated by a sexual encounter. Might a D/s relationship or BDSM be the answer for her? She wrote about it to Uncle Agony. Do pop over to read her email here and let us know your views.

5 comments:

Petals MJ said...

I think by the mere fact that Sh is exploring it, it may very well be an answer for her.

I have gone 5 years without sex before Master, I have had very few partners myself, and I don't "do" casual sex. There are several points to be made, I will attempt to be brief lol.

First, the beauty of the Dom/sub (or whatever labels you desire) relationship is that it can be whatever you want it to be. There is not set formula or criteria you must match to enter in one. I personally always wanted to be dominated, but that can be a scary request when you have encountered trauma or abusive relationships (I have too). Master and I were vanilla first, and I asked him to try BDSM. The journey has been fun, libertating, and at times frustrating. It also has been intensely gratifying, almost overwhelmingly so!

I have no experience in finding Doms online but I would echo Pygar in the sentiment that in the beginning, your safety is your responsibility. Until you are in a committed, consensual relationship, I would definitely have many safeguards in place. Also, to begin with, your relationships don't have to involve penetration. I have heard there are many sites that offer "play" sessions with Doms. This would introduce you to the psychological aspect of this dynamic, which truthfully encompasses about 90% of the lifestyle anyway!

I believe, and this is my opinion only, that gratifying sex doesn't come from the physical act. I have never known pleasure as I have experienced with my Master. This is mind-blowing to experience and I believe occurs because we truly love and respect the other. Many couples don't have this, and are satisfied. Maybe the answer is to be evenly "yoked" with a like-minded person to yourself.

I am no authority, but I was touched to answer anyway. Best of luck to you!

Pygar said...

Thank you Petals MJ for your thoughtful, powerful and very helpful response.

P

Betsy T said...

I was just thinking about how women in. D/S relationship seem to have higher than normal sex drives. I know my has skyrocketed after we started!

Pygar said...

Thanks Betsy T. I was just about to write further about this in another post!

- P xx

anica8186 said...

I'm so gla I've found your blog! and specially this post. I've just started my own (below)where I hope to relate some of my frustrations on being unable to push things further or on finding a D/s relationship...
http://tiemeupholdmedown.wordpress.com/2014/04/