In my previous post I discussed the relationship between the physical and psychological or emotional aspects of bdsm. There was unanimity from commenters that the psychological came to the fore. That however much one may crave the sexual or other physical aspects, in the end it was the psychological and emotional aspect that won out. They were what made the physical possible, they were what made the physical work so well.
Beau had published a link to Domina Kat's recent post confession. In it she writes very powerfully of her physical needs. So I thought I might use that as an example of real physical need as opposed to psychological. However on re-reading it the psychological element does come out from it. And Kat herself wrote in a comment, "The emotional/mental is what leads the way in our relationship."
joined in the comments to the last post to point out that however much she may have recently changed
and become more masochistic that did not imply that the psychological
need was not at the core of her relationship.
I suppose all needs must have a psychological element. The very word 'need' has a psychological power to it.
However surely some needs just are deep physical needs. I wonder if we may be frightened of owning up to them. Is it too dangerous to give ourselves up to our animal instincts? Surely some of what we do is to explore this aspect of ourselves ... to explore those animal needs.
Can a vanilla man with a dominant personality keep his kinky girlfriend? - I have often received emails from female submissives who are frustrated that their boyfriend/husband is vanilla and asking for advice. Then a few days ago ...
2 weeks ago