Friday, 25 June 2010


I hope I am not upsetting too many of my readers when I own up to the picture of Pygar at the head of this blog not being me. The Picture is of John Phillip Law in the film Barbarella.

I am much older than he was in that photograph. Though with age one gathers experience and expertise. Together with a little kindness and sense of perspective it has helped me be fortunate on a few occasions to have received similar kindness from some wonderful female friends.

I was faithful to my wife for over 27 years. For reasons I still do not fully understand I decided soon after turning fifty to have my mid-life crisis before it got too late. Since then I have had some wonderful experiences and relationships that have enriched my life. The gifts of submission I have received have been dauntingly humbling. There have been sensual pleasures and delights I had hardly dreamed of. One relationship in particular is burned on my heart and soul forever.

At the start of this I imagined that ten years on it might be time to stop. That when I reached sixty it might be time to return to the quieter, more insular existence I had before.

I will be sixty in a few weeks.

But I am still reasonably fit and active and kind friends say I still look much younger. There are a surprising number of young (to me!) women who like older men. So ...

Part of me wonders if I should just let my new and secret life continue to develop or should I "retire" from my salacious activities or ...

... or should I go for a more major change in my life? A completely new direction throwing the whole of myself into it rather than it being at the fringes of my existence?

As a beautiful female friend used to say to me often:

life is for living


Anonymous said...

It seems as though you approach those "milestone" years seriously. Time for another reevaluation? Why not! My firm believe is that intuition is a much better judge than analysis when it comes to those moments of decision, since in the end we really have no idea of the consequences of our decisions anyway.

By the way, I turned 50 last year and now, on my third marriage, have finally found the loving caring relationship many only dream of--three years and going strong!

Jz said...

Whichever you will regret the least. ;-) (Which I strongly suspect will take retirement out of the picture...)
Major changes are great if you truly find one you want to be throwing the whole of yourself into it. But if you're considering it simply to shake things up, Just Say No. Wait for the one that moves your soul.
My two cents...

David said...

Was that a multiple choice question?

Anonymous said...

If you are enjoying your life and savoring each precious moment, then why stop? Age is just a number, not to mention that I just adore older dominate men!

Have a great weekend,

nbs said...

I see no reason to stop as long as you are enjoying your life!

I know several dominant men who are older than you and frankly I find them to be wonderful.

Enjoy .. and be happy!

Tristan said...

Oh, shut up and hand me that sub.

Like you could retire or even want to. Treat yourself and buy a nice flogger for your birthday :)

Christina said...

Welcome back to blogging Pygar and Happy belated Birthday wishes!

I followed your blog for awhile & then you gave it up as you needed a reprieve - I too gave up having any D/s feelings December 2009 but Ive been bitten by the 'bug' once again & so have returned to blogging!!

Pygar said...

Thank you all so very much for your very kind and supportive words.

Jz's comment and other words did feel right to me.

I laughed out loud though at Tristan's comment. Thank you Tristan for bringing the discussion back to earth! I'm afraid though I have no sub to give you at the moment. Perhaps you could lend me yours to have someone to whom I can administer my birthday spanks (see post above!)


Meanwhile I'm winking seductively, when I think nobody is looking, at Complicated Kitten and Nancy who like older men.

Thank you too to Neo Dom Tom, David and Christina. I do appreciate your support.

I hope Christina that you gain some fulfilment from your rediscovered submissive feelings. Thank you also for the kind birthday wishes.


bonimiss said...

Interesting. I found BDSM at 51 and I have wondered when I will be too old. Hopefully never. But maybe I will have to forgo some of the more stricter ties.