Tuesday, 1 July 2008


Dragonfly wrote here about control.

Reading that and re-reading a story I wrote a little while ago made me think a little about control. It made me reflect that for a Dom to be able to control a sub he must first be able to control himself.


Anonymous said...



Anonymous said...

Perhaps this is part of a wider statement, or maybe one of a number of simlar statements. The general statment being that to be in a sucessful relationship one should first be happy in oneself and of sound mind. The later would include (in my mind) being able to control oneself. One of the hardest (but most useful lessons) I've learned as a submissive is that giving up control to a dominant does not entitle me to give up all self control. Likewise, expecting / looking for control from a Dominant shouldn't be done because I'm finding it difficult to control myself and put my own house in order. That said, it's true that Dominants need better self control than the average man.


Anonymous said...

I agree, my Master always says it and it's one of the first things he taught me. "One must be able to Master themselves before Mastering others." A Dom/me is taking on great responsibility for taking control (and care) of another person and they better be able to handle that responsibility in a proper manner.

If a Dom is not able to control their emotions or actions then how can they expect their sub to do the same?


Pygar said...

Thank you flower and emdie. I agree with what each of you are saying.

It shows though the responsibility placed on a thoughtful Dom - which is right given the trust his sub has in him.


Anonymous said...

Denise, are you a sub by any chance? Pygar, take the leash off the poor girl at once. :-)

Livvy xxx