Thursday, 5 May 2016

The excitement has gone - 2) The first time

Following from the previous post, the second reason that was described as having contributed to the lack of excitement was repetition. What had initially been so very exciting and edgy though constant practice now became closer to the norm.

That very special experience of the first time when it was somehow edgy, out of the normal, almost extreme and certainly on the edge of her comfort zone was somehow lost. She had done it so often that whilst she still got pleasure from it that specialness of it being edgy and new had gone forever.

Doing something for the first time, going to a new and special club, being suspended for the first time when one was anxious about it, having one's first flogging, anything for the first time that is gong to cause anticipation and possibly anxiety. One cannot perhaps get those feeling back. You can only do it for the first time once and that first time will have its own special excitement.

In longer term the perhaps one finds the edgy excitement of bdsm is dulled by repetition. Do you recognise any of this? Are you feeling jaded? Do you sometimes long for something new? Is there a way around it? How can one keep it feeling fresh and exciting?


Anonymous said...

I can see how repetition can occur. To me, when that feeling occurs, it's time to speak to your Dom/me. It's time to work on pushing those boundaries. In my opinion, repetition is stunting your growth. It's the responsibility of both parties to ensure growth continues. It all comes down to communication.

Pygar said...

Thanks His slut. I'm sure all regular readers will know how much I agree with you on the need for good communication.

I think too that imagination is essential to avoid constant repetition. I wonder though if this is enough and you suggest working on pushing boundaries.

Is this always a good thing though? I suppose each time one pushes those boundaries and perhaps even crosses limits then it is again new, fresh and exiting. But where does one end up? Can it not be dangerous to keep pushing and crossing boundaries? Surely boundaries are there for a reason?

P xx